Dialogue changes to NPCs

Improved the dialogue of the bookshelf containing "zukminbirf."
Added "croupier" name tag to the Roulette NPC's dialog
Improved grammar and wording
Replaced ". " with ". "
Replaced " -- " with an en dash (" – ").

1 files changed, 22 insertions, 22 deletions

diff --git a/world/map/npc/009-1/jack.txt b/world/map/npc/009-1/jack.txt
index 1cafe780..b5244244 100644
--- a/world/map/npc/009-1/jack.txt
+++ b/world/map/npc/009-1/jack.txt
@@ -39,7 +39,7 @@
     if (@Q_Forestbow > 1) goto L_Bow_state_2;
 
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"Hello there, my name is Jack Lumber, the enemy of all trees.  If you need some firewood just let me know.\"";
+    mes "\"Hello there! My name is Jack Lumber, the enemy of all trees. If you need some firewood, just let me know.\"";
     if (@inspector == 1)
         goto L_NohMask_Ask;
     goto L_NotInspector;
@@ -60,21 +60,21 @@ L_Next:
 
 L_Next1:
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"A week ago I was going to chop down one of those twigleaf trees in the forest to the southwest. These twigleafs are the trees that give me the living wood you speak of. I was just chopping away with my axe and what happened? One of its branches hit me! I thought it fell down or the wind blew it. It hurt! I shook it off and struck it again with my axe and another branch hit me! I got angry and started to chop off all the branches near the ground so this couldn't happen anymore. But I still can't believe what happened next.\"";
+    mes "\"A week ago, I was going to chop down one of those twigleaf trees in the forest to the southwest – these twigleafs are the trees that give me the living wood you speak of. I was just chopping away with my axe, and guess what happened? One of its branches hit me! At first, I thought it fell down or the wind blew it, but it hurt! After I shook it off and struck the tree again with my axe, another branch hit me! I got angry and started to chop off all the low-hanging branches so this couldn't happen anymore. Even after all that though, I still can't believe what happened next.\"";
     next;
     menu
         "What happened? ", L_Next2;
 
 L_Next2:
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"You'll think I am insane when I tell you.\"";
+    mes "\"You'll think I'm insane if I tell you...\"";
     next;
     menu
         "I won't. I promise.", L_Next3;
 
 L_Next3:
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"OK. After I chopped off a few branches the whole tree started to move. Its roots tore out of the earth, all the branches started to wave around and a face appeared on the trunk. The whole tree CAME TO LIFE! It was mad!\"";
+    mes "\"Alright, well... After I chopped off a few branches, the whole tree started to move! Its roots tore out of the earth, all the branches started to wave around, and a face appeared on the trunk. The whole tree CAME TO LIFE! It was mad!\"";
     next;
     menu
         "Did you run away?", L_Next4,
@@ -82,28 +82,28 @@ L_Next3:
 
 L_Next4:
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"I fought, of course! I took my axe and attacked the beast! It hit me here *points at a bruise at his shoulder*, here *lifts his trouser leg to show another bruise* and here *lifts his shirt and reveals some even worse bruises*. But I didn't give up. I chopped away at it, branch after branch, and in the end I chopped off its roots and it fell to the ground motionless.\"";
+    mes "\"I fought it, of course! I took my axe and attacked the beast! It hit me here *points at a bruise on his shoulder,* here *lifts his trouser leg to show another bruise,* and here *lifts his shirt and reveals even worse bruises.* But I didn't give up! I chopped away at it, branch after branch, and in the end I chopped off its roots, and it fell to the ground – motionless.\"";
     next;
     menu
         "So you beat the monster? Then why are you so scared?", L_Next5;
 
 L_Next5:
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"Well, I was exhausted and had to rest. A few minutes passed and suddenly I was surrounded by a dozen or more of these living trees!\"";
+    mes "\"Well, I was exhausted and had to rest. A few minutes passed, and suddenly I was practically surrounded by a dozen or more of these living trees!\"";
     next;
     menu
-        "Did you fight them, too? ", L_Next6;
+        "Did you fight them too? ", L_Next6;
 
 L_Next6:
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"Are you crazy? I barely destroyed one of those beasts. I was in no shape to fight again. I ran away as fast as I could. Lucky for me the monsters aren't that fast on their tiny root legs. Ha!\"";
+    mes "\"Are you crazy? I barely destroyed one of those beasts; I was in no shape to fight again! I ran away as fast as I could, and lucky for me the monsters aren't that fast on their tiny root legs. Ha!\"";
     next;
     menu
-        "So you aren't chopping down trees anymore?", L_Next7;
+        "So, I guess you aren't chopping down trees anymore?", L_Next7;
 
 L_Next7:
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"I still do. It's my job. But I no longer chop those twigleafs, I'll tell you that. I know the bowyer master wants some wood from them, but I don't care. I won't risk my life for a few gold pieces. If you want to, just go to the southwest. But I won't go there ever again.\"";
+    mes "\"I still do; it's my job. But I'll no longer chop those twigleafs – I'll tell you that. I know the bow master wants some twigleaf wood, but I don't care. I won't risk MY life for a few gold pieces! If you really want to, just go to the southwest, but I  can't help you. I won't go there ever again.\"";
     next;
     menu
         "Southwest you say? OK, thank you.", L_Next8;
@@ -117,14 +117,14 @@ L_Bow_state_2:
     // Bow state 4: The player has found a perfect piece of wood.
     if (@Q_Forestbow > 3) goto L_Bow_state_4;
 
-    mes "\"Good luck hunting those tree monsters - you will need it.\"";
+    mes "\"Good luck hunting those tree monsters – you'll need it.\"";
     if (@inspector != 1)
         goto L_Close;
     goto L_NohMask_Ask;
 
 L_Bow_state_4:
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"You've finally found that perfect piece of living wood Alan needs to make a Forest bow, haven't you?\"";
+    mes "\"You've finally found that perfect piece of living wood that Alan needs to make a Forest Bow, haven't you?\"";
     next;
     menu
         "I couldn't afford the bow, though...", L_Shield_state_0,
@@ -156,13 +156,13 @@ L_Shield_state_0:
         set @child_of_jack$, "son";
 
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"You no doubt remember how I struggled with those beasts, fighting for my life. Scared me, those seven-branched little stumps did!  Never since that day have I strayed near them.  And here comes you, cutting them down one by one.  I'm proud of you, to dare those trunks a fight. You're strong as if you were my own " + @child_of_jack$ + "!\"";
+    mes "\"You no doubt remember how I struggled with those beasts, fighting for my life. Scared me, those seven-branched little stumps did!  Never since that day have I strayed near them, and yet there you are, cutting them down one by one. I'm proud of you – to dare to fight those trunks is admirable indeed. You're as strong as if you were my own " + @child_of_jack$ + "!\"";
     next;
     goto L_Shield_state_1;
 
 L_Shield_state_1:
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"I have an idea.  What would you say about a new shield?\"";
+    mes "\"I have an idea. What would you say about a new shield?\"";
     next;
     if (@inspector == 1)
         menu
@@ -175,7 +175,7 @@ L_Shield_state_1:
 
 L_Yes:
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"All I need is " + @RAWLOGS_AMOUNT + " raw logs.  This needn't be highest-quality wood; pretty much any log you can find should work.   Oh, and I'll also need " + @SHIELD_COST + " GP for other materials.\"";
+    mes "\"All I need is " + @RAWLOGS_AMOUNT + " raw logs. This needn't be high quality wood; pretty much any log you can find should work. Oh, and I'll also need " + @SHIELD_COST + " GP for other materials.\"";
     next;
     set @Q_Woodenshield, 2;
     callsub S_Update_Mask;
@@ -204,14 +204,14 @@ L_Next10:
     callsub S_Update_Mask;
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
     mes "\"Have a seat.\"";
-    mes "Jack saws the logs into pieces, then shaves them until they are smooth to the touch.";
-    mes "Applying some strong-smelling liquid, he tans them in darker hues.";
+    mes "Jack saws the logs into pieces and then sands them until they are smooth to the touch.";
+    mes "Applying some strong-smelling liquid, he tans them to a darker hue.";
     next;
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "Grabbing one of two leftover pieces, he begins to carve it into a round shape, then repeats this with the second piece-- shield handles, from what you can tell.";
+    mes "Grabbing one of two leftover pieces, he begins to carve it into a round shape, then repeats this with the second piece – shield handles from what you can tell.";
     next;
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "Meanwhile, the sun has dried the other pieces.  Jack places them next to each other, adds a frame, and nails everything together.";
+    mes "Meanwhile, the sun has dried the other pieces. Jack places them next to each other, adds a frame, and nails everything together.";
     mes "The resulting shield looks usable already, but Jack applies another liquid to it and leaves it to dry for a few moments.";
     next;
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
@@ -228,12 +228,12 @@ L_Not_enough_logs:
 
 L_Not_enough_money:
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"You don't have enough gold, I'm afraid.  I need " + @SHIELD_COST + " GP to finish your shield.\"";
+    mes "\"I'm afraid that you don't have enough gold. I need " + @SHIELD_COST + " GP to finish your shield.\"";
     goto L_Close;
 
 L_TooMany:
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"You don't have enough room for the shield. Come back when you do.\"";
+    mes "\"You don't have enough room to carry the shield. Come back when you do.\"";
     goto L_Close;
 
 L_Shield_state_3:
@@ -279,7 +279,7 @@ L_Daily:
     next;
 
     mes "[Jack Lumber]";
-    mes "\"Check back with me tomorrow to see if I need any help with that shipment.\"";
+    mes "\"Check back with me tomorrow, and I'll let you know if I need any help with that shipment.\"";
 
     goto L_Close;