From 2ed796ed16b76094293e492973820d1d90623a29 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Frost Date: Mon, 23 Jan 2012 12:27:30 -0800 Subject: Minor grammar edits to birrod, kimarr, and yerrnk --- world/map/npc/033-1/birrod.txt | 26 +++++++++++++------------- world/map/npc/033-1/kimarr.txt | 12 ++++++------ world/map/npc/033-1/yerrnk.txt | 38 +++++++++++++++++++------------------- 3 files changed, 38 insertions(+), 38 deletions(-) (limited to 'world/map/npc/033-1') diff --git a/world/map/npc/033-1/birrod.txt b/world/map/npc/033-1/birrod.txt index c0e159e3..28dd6c56 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/033-1/birrod.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/033-1/birrod.txt @@ -31,7 +31,7 @@ L_Kimarr: mes "[Birrod]"; mes "\"Great! Very well done! Welcome to our tribe.\""; next; - mes "\"But I think, Kimarr has something for you.\""; + mes "\"I think Kimarr has something for you.\""; goto L_Close; L_Hunting: @@ -41,7 +41,7 @@ L_Hunting: mes "\"Hello, " + strcharinfo(0) + "! Would you like to prove your hunting skills again?\""; next; mes "\"I noticed some groups of Wolverns in the forest west of here which are unusually aggressive."; - mes "This makes it dangerous for all the small people from the town nearby to go there.\""; + mes "This makes it dangerous for all the small people from the nearby town to go there.\""; next; mes "\"To prove your skills, go to the forest and hunt down " + $@Q_Barbarians_wolvern_amount + " of the very aggressive Wolverns.\""; next; @@ -72,14 +72,14 @@ L_Wolverns_Done: getexp @wolvern_exp, 0; if (getskilllv(SKILL_POOL) == 0) goto L_Not_Ready; - mes "\"Your skills are impressing. You are worthy to be called a warrior of the Mangarr, if you accept.\""; + mes "\"Your skills are impressive. You are worthy to be called a warrior of the Mangarr, if you accept.\""; next; goto L_Questions; L_Questions: if (getskilllv(SKILL_POOL) == 0) goto L_Not_Ready; - mes "Birrod has a very ceremonial look on his face."; + mes "Birrod has a very solemn look on his face."; mes "[Birrod]"; mes "\"" + strcharinfo(0) + ", are you ready to become a full-fledged member of our tribe, the Mangarr?\""; menu @@ -89,13 +89,13 @@ L_Questions: mes "Birrod nods earnestly."; mes "[Birrod]"; mes "\"I will ask you some questions."; - mes "Think well and be honest, because it will depend on your answers if you will be considered worthily.\""; + mes "Think well and be honest, because your answers will determine whether you are worthy.\""; next; mes "\"What's the most important thing for a true warrior?\""; menu "Strength!",L_Fail11, "A good weapon.",L_Fail12, - "Braveness.",L_Success11; + "Bravery.",L_Success11; L_Fail11: mes "[Birrod]"; mes "\"Strength is indeed important for a warrior. But before you can show strength, you need to have something else.\""; @@ -122,7 +122,7 @@ L_Fail21: goto L_No_Member; L_Fail22: mes "[Birrod]"; - mes "\"Honorably but stupid.\""; + mes "\"Honorable, but stupid.\""; next; goto L_No_Member; L_Success21: @@ -152,8 +152,8 @@ L_Fail31: L_Success3: mes "\"What is your goal in life?\""; menu - "Learning new things and see the world.",L_Success41, - "Becoming as powerful as I can.",L_Fail41, + "Learn new things and see the world.",L_Success41, + "Become as powerful as I can.",L_Fail41, "Protect the ones I love.",L_Success42; L_Success41: mes "[Birrod]"; @@ -194,17 +194,17 @@ L_Success5: setskill SKILL_WARRIOR_RAGING, 1; set @state, 6; callsub S_Update_Mask; - mes "You feel an exciting vim inside of you."; + mes "You feel an exciting energy inside you."; mes "[Birrod]"; mes "\"You are now a warrior of the Mangarr.\""; next; - mes "\"Therefore you gain the ability to put back your own safety for Raging in battle with a tremendous power."; - mes "This power now lies within you, waiting for someone to help you focusing on it.\""; + mes "\"As a Mangarr warrior, you gain the ability to put back your own safety for Raging in battle with a tremendous power."; + mes "This power now lies within you, waiting for someone to help you focus on it.\""; goto L_Close; L_Impressed: mes "[Birrod]"; - mes "\"I'm very proud of you being a member of the tribe.\""; + mes "\"I'm very proud that you're a member of the tribe.\""; goto L_Close; L_Not_Ready: diff --git a/world/map/npc/033-1/kimarr.txt b/world/map/npc/033-1/kimarr.txt index abe8a843..6e4a12ba 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/033-1/kimarr.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/033-1/kimarr.txt @@ -48,7 +48,7 @@ next; mes "\"I am Kimarr, hunter and warrior of the Mangarr.\""; next; - mes "\"You are very small, better be careful in this snowy mountains. It is cold and dangerous monsters are here.\""; + mes "\"You are very small and must be careful in these snowy mountains. It is cold, and dangerous monsters are here.\""; menu "Hello, my name is " + strcharinfo(0) + " and I'm not small. I'm a great warrior!",-, "I'm " + strcharinfo(0) + ", don't underestimate me. I'm an experienced adventurer!",-, @@ -72,7 +72,7 @@ L_Explain_Game: mes "[Kimarr]"; mes "\"In that cave there are living Fluffies. They like to eat apples.\""; next; - mes "\"I also saw one of them getting excited about one of that sweet things you call 'cake'.\""; + mes "\"I also saw one of them getting excited about one of those sweet things you call 'cake'.\""; next; mes "\"Go to the cave entrance and throw food on the floor to make them come out.\""; next; @@ -95,7 +95,7 @@ L_Ask: L_AlreadyGotReward: npctalk strcharinfo(0) + " killed " + $@Fluffy_Kills + " Fluffies and has once again proven to be a good hunter."; - message strcharinfo(0), "Kimarr: Once again you prove you are worth as a hunter! You killed " + $@Fluffy_Kills + " Fluffies."; + message strcharinfo(0), "Kimarr: Once again you prove your worth as a hunter! You killed " + $@Fluffy_Kills + " Fluffies."; callsub S_Clean; goto L_Close; @@ -121,7 +121,7 @@ L_Reward1: // full at the time, when you next initiate dialog (with @state == 2) L_Reward: mes "[Kimarr]"; - mes "\"That was very impressive - now you can call yourself a hunter, " + strcharinfo(0) + ".\""; + mes "\"That was very impressive. Now you can call yourself a hunter, " + strcharinfo(0) + ".\""; next; getinventorylist; @@ -165,7 +165,7 @@ L_Game: L_Someone_Else: mes "[Kimarr]"; - mes "\"At the moment someone else is hunting. Let's wait until that hunting has ended.\""; + mes "\"Someone else is hunting right now. Let's wait until that hunt has ended.\""; goto L_Close; L_Attention: @@ -176,7 +176,7 @@ OnTimer1000: // Checking if player is logged if (attachrid($@Fluffy_FighterID) == 0) goto L_GotOut; -// Checking if player is still in the map or used a towell or spell to get out +// Checking if player is still in the map or used a towel or spell to get out if (getareausers("033-1.gat", 79, 28, 88, 42) == 0) goto L_GotOut; if (PC_DIE_COUNTER > $@Fluffy_PC_Deaths) diff --git a/world/map/npc/033-1/yerrnk.txt b/world/map/npc/033-1/yerrnk.txt index 8cb9e13d..64238524 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/033-1/yerrnk.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/033-1/yerrnk.txt @@ -16,7 +16,7 @@ mes "[Barbarian]"; mes "\"Hello. I'm Yerrnk, first warrior of the Mangarr.\""; next; - mes "Yerrnk looks at you in a reserved way."; + mes "Yerrnk looks at you cautiously."; mes "[Yerrnk]"; mes "\"Please take care of your own business.\""; goto L_Close; @@ -27,7 +27,7 @@ L_Fluffy: mes "He sighs."; next; mes "[Yerrnk]"; - mes "\"Are you going to accept Kimarr's task? It's an ancient ceremony in our tribe. A young member is accepted as an adult when completing it.\""; + mes "\"Are you going to accept Kimarr's task? It's an ancient ceremony in our tribe. A young member is accepted as an adult after completing it.\""; goto L_Close; L_Kimarr: @@ -39,32 +39,32 @@ L_Duty: mes "[Yerrnk]"; mes "\"I'm not sure if you are aware about the meaning of your actions.\""; next; - mes "\"You passed the inition ritus for hunters of our tribe. That means now you are a hunter of our tribe, with all the rights and duties that come along with that.\""; + mes "\"You passed the initiation rite for hunters of our tribe. That means now you are a hunter of our tribe, with all the rights and duties that come along with that.\""; next; - mes "\"So you'll have to obey our laws and traditions, protect and help any member of our tribe that is in need and never show weakness nor fear in battle.\""; + mes "\"So you'll have to obey our laws and traditions, protect and help any member of our tribe that is in need, and show neither weakness nor fear in battle.\""; next; - mes "\"Keep this in mind. If you fail you'll have to recieve the elders judgement.\""; + mes "\"Keep this in mind. If you fail you'll have to receive the elders' judgement.\""; goto L_Close; L_Sorrow: mes "[Yerrnk]"; mes "\"I noticed that you're getting along with Kimarr and Birrod very well. That's good.\""; - mes "He smiles, but then an expression of worry gets back to his face."; + mes "He smiles, but then an expression of worry returns to his face."; next; L_Mission: mes "[Yerrnk]"; - mes "\"Our tribe is going through dire straits. We used to live in harmony with the mountain ever since."; + mes "\"Our tribe is going through dire times. We have lived in harmony with the mountain since time beyond memory."; mes "Life is hard in the snowy mountains, but this life suits our nature.\""; next; - mes "\"Some weeks ago the Yetis started to act very strange. Usually they are very shy, but now..."; + mes "\"Some weeks ago the Yetis started to act very strangely. Usually they are very shy, but now...."; mes "They left the secluded areas high up in the mountains they used to live on and started roaming our hunting grounds.\""; next; mes "\"It became very dangerous to leave the village, so it's even harder to gather enough food to survive."; - mes "But not only this, the Yetis are getting more daring every day - they might attack the village itself sooner or later.\""; + mes "Not only this, but the Yetis are getting more daring every day. They might attack the village itself sooner or later.\""; next; - mes "\"Other wild animals got more aggressive as well, though the Yetis are the most dangerous."; - mes "Something like that has never happened before. We have no idea what could cause the animals to behave like this.\""; + mes "\"Other wild animals are more aggressive as well, though the Yetis are the most dangerous."; + mes "Something like this has never happened before. We have no idea what could cause the animals to behave like this.\""; next; mes "\"That's why we were sent on a mission to find and talk to Santa, one of the Sages of Kaizei."; mes "The Sages are wizards of great power and wisdom, and we hope Santa might be able to give us advice.\""; @@ -73,11 +73,11 @@ L_Mission: L_Birrod: mes "[Yerrnk]"; mes "\"" + strcharinfo(0) + ", I have to admit that I'm surprised by your skills."; - mes "You've proved your braveness and strength.\""; + mes "You've proven your bravery and strength.\""; next; if (getskilllv(SKILL_POOL) == 0) goto L_Not_Ready; - mes "\"Please talk to Birrod to receive the initiation ritual to become a warrior of the Mangarr.\""; + mes "\"Please talk to Birrod to receive the initiation rite to become a warrior of the Mangarr.\""; menu "Alright.",-, "Can you tell me again what you are here for?",L_Mission; @@ -97,7 +97,7 @@ L_Warrior: mes "\"" + strcharinfo(0) + ", welcome back!"; mes "Do you have any question?\""; menu - "Everything's alright, thanks.",-, + "Everything's all right, thanks.",-, "What are you doing down here?",L_Mission, "Can you explain the Raging ability to me?",L_Skill, "Do you have a task for me?",L_Task; @@ -108,14 +108,14 @@ L_Skill: mes "\"As a warrior of our tribe it should be the most important thing to you to defend weaker members of the tribe."; mes "To achieve this goal our warriors are training the skill to stand the pain of being hit and even use it to get into a state of rage.\""; next; - mes "\"It only works in a melee fight, when you hear your opponent gasping, smell his sweat, and feel the heat of his body.\""; + mes "\"It works only in a melee fight, when you hear your opponent gasping, smell his sweat, and feel the heat of his body.\""; next; - mes "Yerrnk gets excited, then he pauses a moment calming down."; - mes "\"Basically its a neglect of your own defense but therefor being able to hit the enemy with outstanding might.\""; + mes "Yerrnk gets excited, then he pauses a moment to calm down."; + mes "\"Basically you neglect of your own defense but gain the ability to hit your enemy with outstanding might.\""; next; mes "[Yerrnk]"; - mes "\"You can imagine that this comprises some danger. That's why we usually fight as a group, so a weakened warrior can step back and recover while the others keep the fight."; - mes "It's also beneficial to have a healer, but very few members of our tribe are born with the capability to wield magic.\""; + mes "\"You can imagine that this creates some danger. That's why we usually fight as a group, so a weakened warrior can step back and recover while the others continue to fight."; + mes "It's also beneficial to have a healer, but very few members of our tribe are born with the ability to wield magic.\""; goto L_Close; L_Task: -- cgit v1.2.3-60-g2f50