From 5df19e3c04e55acad16f28c38ba29055c58d3b85 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Dino Paskvan Date: Mon, 15 Jul 2013 16:05:44 +0200 Subject: Orum and Waric quest proofreading and editing All the NPCs involved in the quest have been edited, with help from Dyna. --- world/map/npc/012-1/flowerpentagram2.txt | 22 ++-- world/map/npc/012-1/shops.txt | 14 +- world/map/npc/013-1/flowerpentagram.txt | 2 +- world/map/npc/017-1/flowerpentagram1.txt | 14 +- world/map/npc/017-4/guardingspirit.txt | 32 ++--- world/map/npc/017-4/orum.txt | 218 +++++++++++++++---------------- world/map/npc/017-4/waric.txt | 34 ++--- world/map/npc/018-1/flowerpentagram3.txt | 22 ++-- world/map/npc/055-1/flowerpentagram4.txt | 22 ++-- world/map/npc/056-1/flowerpentagram5.txt | 24 ++-- 10 files changed, 202 insertions(+), 202 deletions(-) (limited to 'world/map/npc') diff --git a/world/map/npc/012-1/flowerpentagram2.txt b/world/map/npc/012-1/flowerpentagram2.txt index 440d2571..d719ad00 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/012-1/flowerpentagram2.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/012-1/flowerpentagram2.txt @@ -7,11 +7,11 @@ if (OrumQuest > 20) goto L_PlacedSecondFlower; if (OrumQuest == 20) goto L_SecondFlower; - message strcharinfo(0), "Something is odd with this place."; + message strcharinfo(0), "There is something odd about this place."; end; L_SecondFlower: - mes "Orum described this place. Here you have to place the second magical flower."; + mes "Orum described this place. You have to place the second magical flower here."; menu "Place the flower.", -, "Leave.", L_Close; @@ -19,7 +19,7 @@ L_SecondFlower: if (isin("012-1.gat", 142, 69, 144, 71)) goto L_Place; - mes "This doesn't work, you're too far away."; + mes "This isn't working, you're too far away."; goto L_Close; L_Place: @@ -35,8 +35,8 @@ L_Place: if (countitem("PurpleSummonFlower") < 1) goto L_NoFlower; delitem "PurpleSummonFlower", 1; - mes "Remembering what happened last time, you take a careful look around. Everything's calm. You proceed and place the second flower."; - mes "Tension builds up around you. You're alarmed."; + mes "Remembering what happened the last time, you take a careful look around. Everything's calm. You proceed to place the second flower."; + mes "Sensing a certain tension build up around you, you can't help but feel alarmed."; set OrumQuest, 21; close2; areamonster "012-1.gat", 140, 64, 146, 73, "", 1105, 2, "#FlowerPentagram2::OnSquirrelDeath"; @@ -70,24 +70,24 @@ OnRScorpionDeath: L_MonstersAlive: mes "As you get closer to the place, you feel an unnerving presence."; - mes "The place has recently been used to summon something! And the beings are still near!"; + mes "This place has recently been used to summon something! And the beings are still nearby!"; next; mes "You should get rid of them before attempting the summoning yourself."; goto L_Close; L_NoFlower: mes "You look into your pocket, but the flower isn't there. Where did you put it?"; - mes "If you can't find it again, better talk to Orum."; + mes "If you can't find it, you should talk to Orum again."; goto L_Close; L_PlacedSecondFlower: - mes "On this spot you placed the second of Orum's magical flowers."; - mes "There's a slight glowing of magic power around the place, waiting to be unleashed."; + mes "You placed the second of Orum's magical flowers on this spot."; + mes "You can still feel the magical power shimmering around this place, waiting to be unleashed."; goto L_Close; L_PlacedFifthFlower: - mes "This is the place where you put the second of Orum's magical flowers."; - mes "But after the pentagram was finished and the summoning happened, everything is back to normal with this spot."; + mes "This is where you placed the second of Orum's magical flowers."; + mes "However, now that the summoning spell has been cast, everything is back to normal here."; goto L_Close; L_Close: diff --git a/world/map/npc/012-1/shops.txt b/world/map/npc/012-1/shops.txt index b15b2c3d..ac627e1f 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/012-1/shops.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/012-1/shops.txt @@ -9,7 +9,7 @@ menu "Sure.", L_Shop, "Not right now.", L_Close, - "Can I trade this Rose Hat against a different one?", L_RoseHat; + "Can I trade this Rose Hat for a differently colored one?", L_RoseHat; L_Shop: shop "#FlowerShop"; @@ -23,7 +23,7 @@ L_RoseHat: "A white one.", -, "A pink one.", -, "A yellow one.", -, - "A orange one.", -, + "An orange one.", -, "A blue one.", -; set @have_id, @base_id + @menu - 1; @@ -34,7 +34,7 @@ L_RoseHat: "A white one.", -, "A pink one.", -, "A yellow one.", -, - "A orange one.", -, + "An orange one.", -, "A blue one.", -; set @receive_id, @base_id + @menu - 1; @@ -51,17 +51,17 @@ L_RoseHat: L_NoItem: mes "[Blossom]"; mes "\"Oh, you don't have a Rose Hat in that color."; - mes "Did you mean something else?\""; + mes "Did you mean a different color?\""; menu "Yes, I meant a different color.", L_RoseHat, "No, I changed my mind.", L_Close; L_SameColor: mes "[Blossom]"; - mes "\"Oh, but it doesn't make sense to trade agains the same color."; - mes "Did you mean something else?\""; + mes "\"Oh, you already have a hat in that color."; + mes "Did you want something else?\""; menu - "Yes, let me correct.", L_RoseHat, + "Yes, let me pick a different color.", L_RoseHat, "No, I changed my mind.", L_Close; L_Close: diff --git a/world/map/npc/013-1/flowerpentagram.txt b/world/map/npc/013-1/flowerpentagram.txt index ccab787c..73618c69 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/013-1/flowerpentagram.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/013-1/flowerpentagram.txt @@ -3,7 +3,7 @@ end; OnSummon: - announce "Sagatha: What fool trick is this? Who dares to toy around with the forest like this?", 0; + announce "Sagatha: What kind of a foolish trick is this? Who dares to create such calamity in my forest?", 0; callsub S_CleanUp; // area closely to sagatha diff --git a/world/map/npc/017-1/flowerpentagram1.txt b/world/map/npc/017-1/flowerpentagram1.txt index 5b09f346..817e6909 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/017-1/flowerpentagram1.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/017-1/flowerpentagram1.txt @@ -7,7 +7,7 @@ if (OrumQuest > 17) goto L_PlacedFirstFlower; if (OrumQuest == 17) goto L_FirstFlower; - message strcharinfo(0), "Something is odd with this place."; + message strcharinfo(0), "Something is odd about this place."; end; L_FirstFlower: @@ -55,24 +55,24 @@ OnScorpionDeath: L_MonstersAlive: mes "As you get closer to the place, you feel an unnerving presence."; - mes "The place has recently been used to summon something! And the beings are still near!"; + mes "This place has recently been used to summon something! And the beings are still nearby!"; next; mes "You should get rid of them before attempting the summoning yourself."; goto L_Close; L_NoFlower: mes "You don't have the flower with you. Where did you put it?"; - mes "If you can't find it again, you'll have to tell Orum."; + mes "If you can't find it, you should talk to Orum again."; goto L_Close; L_PlacedFirstFlower: - mes "This is the place where you put the first of Orum's magical flowers."; - mes "You still feel a slight glowing of magic power around the place, waiting to be unleashed."; + mes "You placed the first of Orum's magical flowers on this spot."; + mes "You can still feel the magical power shimmering around this place, waiting to be unleashed."; goto L_Close; L_PlacedFifthFlower: - mes "This is the place where you put the first of Orum's magical flowers."; - mes "But after the pentagram was finished and the summoning happened, everything is back to normal with this spot."; + mes "This is where you placed the first of Orum's magical flowers."; + mes "However, now that the summoning spell has been cast, everything is back to normal here."; goto L_Close; L_Close: diff --git a/world/map/npc/017-4/guardingspirit.txt b/world/map/npc/017-4/guardingspirit.txt index b6e38d0d..c3f2ebc8 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/017-4/guardingspirit.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/017-4/guardingspirit.txt @@ -9,41 +9,41 @@ L_Talk: goto L_Chat; mes "[Guarding Spirit]"; - mes "\"Hold on! My master doesn't wish to get disturbed! I can't let you enter.\""; + mes "\"Hold there! My master does not wish to be disturbed! I cannot let you enter.\""; menu "Who is your master?", L_Master, "But I have important things I need to discuss with your master!", L_Helped, "Oh, so he's finally back?", L_Back, - "Ok, ok.", L_Close; + "Okay, okay.", L_Close; L_Back: mes "[Guarding Spirit]"; - mes "\"Yeah, finally... He was gone for quite a while, and now he came back with this scary and quainty guy...\""; + mes "\"Yes, he was gone for quite a while. When he arrived home, he had a rather frightening looking guy with him.\""; next; - mes "\"Ehem, I mean. Yes, mortal. He came back into his residence and doesn't wish to interact with those below his dignity. Leave.\""; + mes "\"Ahem, I mean, yes Mortal. He came back to his residence and does not wish to interact with those below his status. Leave!\""; goto L_Close; L_Master: mes "[Guarding Spirit]"; - mes "\"He's a powerful wizard. He can force the elements to obey his will. He talks to demons and higher beings from the astral plane, such as I am.\""; + mes "\"He is a powerful wizard. He can force the very elements to obey his will! He regularly communes with demons and higher beings from the astral plane, such as myself.\""; next; - mes "\"Mankind knows him with under the name 'Orum'.\""; + mes "\"Mankind knows his name as 'Orum'.\""; menu "Hey, I helped him out some while ago!", L_Helped, - "Orum? That guy who feels weary due to some transmution spells?", L_Disrespectful, + "Orum? That guy who feels weary due to some transmutation spells?", L_Disrespectful, "Then I better respect his wish and leave!", L_Close; L_Disrespectful: mes "[Guarding Spirit]"; - mes "\"WHAT are you saying? Are you making fun of my master?! You'll regret that!\""; + mes "\"What are you saying? Who are you to mock my Master?! You will regret that!\""; set Hp, 1 + Hp/5; goto L_Close; L_Helped: mes "[Guarding Spirit]"; - mes "\"Really? That sounds unplausible to me...\""; + mes "\"Really? That sounds implausible to me.\""; next; - mes "\"Why should my master mess around with such a puny mortal as you are?\""; + mes "\"Why would my master mess around with such a puny mortal as yourself?\""; menu "I'd like to offer him my humble services...", L_Pass, "Listen, he'll get angry if you don't let me pass. ", L_Pass, @@ -51,25 +51,25 @@ L_Helped: L_Pass: mes "[Guarding Spirit]"; - mes "\"Mh. Mh... All right, I let you pass.\""; + mes "\"Alright, I will let you pass.\""; next; - mes "\"Remember to talk to him with befitting respect.\""; + mes "\"Remember that when you speak with him, do so with respect for someone befitting his status.\""; set OrumQuest, 15; warp "017-4.gat", 201, 26; goto L_Close; L_Block: mes "[Guarding Spirit]"; - mes "\"Stop, mortal! I can't let you pass!\""; + mes "\"Stop, mortal! I cannot let you pass!\""; menu "What? Who are you?", -, "Why?", -, "Ok...", L_Close; mes "[Guarding Spirit]"; - mes "\"My master summoned me for the sole purpose to prevent his refuge being entered during his absence."; - mes "I'll guard this cave with all my power!\""; + mes "\"My master summoned me for the sole purpose of preventing anyone else from entering his refuge."; + mes "I'll stand guard and protect it with all my power!\""; next; - mes "\"Because... otherwise he'll punish me. That hurts.\""; + mes "\"If I fail, he will punish me. I do not like being punished by his magic, it hurts.\""; goto L_Close; L_Chat: diff --git a/world/map/npc/017-4/orum.txt b/world/map/npc/017-4/orum.txt index 7adf5b0b..79ba38b0 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/017-4/orum.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/017-4/orum.txt @@ -85,23 +85,23 @@ L_InitialTalk: // 15: Persuaded the Guarding Spirit to let you into the cave mes "He turns to you."; mes "\"I told you not to follow us! Are you so eager to die?\""; menu - "I'm here to offer my service...", -, - "Hah, you thought you could hide from me?", L_Banish, - "Keep calm, I want to work together with you.", -, + "I'm here to offer my services...", -, + "Ha! You thought you could hide from me?", L_Banish, + "Keep calm, I want to work with you.", -, "D-d-die?!", L_Banish; mes "[Orum]"; mes "\"You want to help us?\""; - mes "Waric raises his eyebrows..."; + mes "Waric raises his eyebrows."; next; mes "[Orum]"; mes "\"I don't think that's a good idea.\""; menu "You won't know until you try.", -, - "You have no choice, I found your hideout!", L_Banish; + "You have no choice, I've found your hideout!", L_Banish; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Well, why not. Here is a simple task to proof you're serious."; + mes "\"Well, why not? Here is a simple enough task to prove you're serious."; mes "Bring me " + @AMOUNT_SMALLMUSHROOM + " Small Mushrooms, " + @AMOUNT_ASH + " Piles of Ash and one Orange Tulip.\""; set OrumQuest, 16; @@ -110,7 +110,7 @@ L_InitialTalk: // 15: Persuaded the Guarding Spirit to let you into the cave "Why do you need that?", -; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Don't ask stupid questions! Do what I told you.\""; + mes "\"Don't ask stupid questions! Do as you're told.\""; mes "..."; mes "\"Those things are ingredients for a magical artifact. You don't need to know more at the moment.\""; goto L_Close; @@ -118,7 +118,7 @@ L_InitialTalk: // 15: Persuaded the Guarding Spirit to let you into the cave L_Banish: mes "[Orum]"; mes "\"This will be the last mistake you did...\""; - mes "He starts mumbering and you suddenly feel weirdly weightless. Your vision fades..."; + mes "He starts mumbling under his breath and you suddenly feel weirdly weightless. Your vision fades..."; mes "The last thing you hear is Waric shouting something about untalented apprentices."; set Hp, 1 + rand(5); warp "017-1.gat", 0, 0; @@ -126,7 +126,7 @@ L_Banish: L_FirstFlower: // 16: Got task to bring materials for first magical flower mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"So? Where are the " + @AMOUNT_SMALLMUSHROOM + " Small Mushrooms, " + @AMOUNT_ASH + " Piles of Ash and Orange Tulip you should bring?\""; + mes "\"So? Where are the " + @AMOUNT_SMALLMUSHROOM + " Small Mushrooms, " + @AMOUNT_ASH + " Piles of Ash and Orange Tulip you should've brought?\""; menu "I have everything you want!", -, "I don't have it yet.", L_Close; @@ -142,28 +142,28 @@ L_FirstFlower: // 16: Got task to bring materials for first magical flower getitem "OrangeSummonFlower", 1; set OrumQuest, 17; - mes "Orum takes the items and starts to pulverize them, mixes some of it together in the caldron and finally dips the tulip into it, mumbering enchantements. The tulip changes its appearance. Then he hands it over to you."; + mes "Orum takes the items and starts crushing them, using a very old-looking mortar and pestle. As they turn into a fine powder, he mixes some of it together in the cauldron and finally dips the tulip into it, mumbling enchantements. The tulip changes its appearance. Then he hands it over to you."; mes "[Orum]"; mes "\"Phew, done. Now I feel exhausted. You need to place it at its destination.\""; next; L_WayFirstFlower: - mes "\"We prepared a place for this in the forest outside the caves. When you left the cave, go some steps to the east and you'll find a spot of grass with flowers on a small hill. There you have to place it, right in the middle.\""; + mes "\"We prepared a place for this in the forest outside the caves. When you leave the cave, go a couple of steps to the east and you'll find a spot of grass with flowers on a small hill. You have to place it there, right in the middle.\""; goto L_Close; L_PlaceFirstFlower: // 17: Got task to place the first magical flower mes "[Orum]"; mes "\"Go ahead and place the first magical flower.\""; menu - "Ok, will do that.", L_Close, - "Can you explain the way again?", L_WayFirstFlower, + "Okay, I'll do that.", L_Close, + "Could you explain where to place it, one more time?", L_WayFirstFlower, "I... I lost it.", -; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"What?! I can't believe it! How can you handle a powerful magical artifact in such a careless way?\""; + mes "\"What?! I can't believe this! How could you handle a powerful magical artifact in such a careless way?\""; next; mes "\"This behaviour shouldn't remain unpunished. Pay a recompensation fee of " + @RECOMPENSATION_1 + " GP, and I'm going to allow you to continue helping us. So?\""; menu - "Ok.", -, + "Okay.", -, "No way, that's too much!", L_NoRecompensation; if (Zeny < @RECOMPENSATION_1) @@ -179,7 +179,7 @@ L_PlacedFirstFlower: // 18: Placed first magical flower mes "[Orum]"; mes "\"I felt the eruption of magical power when you placed it! Wonderful! Let's start with the next one right now.\""; menu - "Ok, what should I do now?", -, + "Okay, what should I do now?", -, "Weird monsters appeared when I placed it!", L_AskMonsters; set OrumQuest, 19; @@ -187,7 +187,7 @@ L_PlacedFirstFlower: // 18: Placed first magical flower L_AskMonsters: mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Oh, right. Well, that was to be expected, some of the power seeped out when you placed it. I hope those monsters didn't harm you?"; + mes "\"Oh, right. Well, that was to be expected, some of the power seeped out when you placed it. I hope those monsters didn't harm you."; mes "However, we should continue.\""; set OrumQuest, 19; next; @@ -212,15 +212,15 @@ L_SecondFlower: // 19: Got task to bring materials for second magical flower getitem "PurpleSummonFlower", 1; set OrumQuest, 20; - mes "Orum starts to handle the material similiar to the ones for the first flower. Suddenly something from the pulver gets on his hand and it makes a nasty frizzling sound. He yells in pain. After cleaning his hand he continues. At the end he gives you another magical flower while rubbing his hand."; + mes "Orum starts to work on the materials you've gathered, in the same manner he did the first time. Suddenly something from the mortar gets on his hand and it makes a nasty sizzling noise. He yells in pain, clutching his hand to his chest. After cleaning his hand he continues. In the end he gives you another magical flower while rubbing his hand."; next; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Ouch, it still hurts. I need to recover. You're going to place it.\""; + mes "\"Ouch, it still hurts. I need some time to recover. In the meantime, go and place the flower.\""; next; L_WaySecondFlower: mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"The next spot is in the Woodland Hills. When you left our caves, go south until you come out of the forest and then to the west, past the hut of that old man."; - mes "The spot where you have to place it is on higher ground, so you eventually have to find a way through the caves to reach it.\""; + mes "\"The next spot is in the Woodland Hills. When you leave our caves, go south until you come out of the forest. Then walk west, past the hut of that old man."; + mes "The spot where you have to place it is on higher ground, so you'll have to find a way through the caves to reach it.\""; goto L_Close; L_AskPurpose: @@ -230,14 +230,14 @@ L_AskPurpose: L_PlaceSecondFlower: // 20: Got task to place the second magical flower mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Go to place second magical flower.\""; + mes "\"Go and place the second magical flower.\""; menu "I'm on my way.", L_Close, "Where do I have to put it again?", L_WaySecondFlower, - "Sorry, I lost it.", -; + "Sorry, I've lost it.", -; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"What?! You incompetent dumbhead! I got hurt while creating this powerful magical artifact and you lose it!\""; + mes "\"What?! You incompetent dunderhead! I got hurt while creating this powerful magical artifact and you managed to lose it!?\""; next; mes "\"This behaviour shouldn't remain unpunished. Pay a recompensation fee of " + @RECOMPENSATION_2 + " GP, and I'm going to allow you to continue helping us. So?\""; menu @@ -250,14 +250,14 @@ L_PlaceSecondFlower: // 20: Got task to place the second magical flower set OrumQuest, 19; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Ok, now that this is settled, bring me " + @AMOUNT_PINKPETAL + " Pink Petals, " + @AMOUNT_STINGER + " Scorpion Stingers and one Pink Tulip again.\""; + mes "\"Okay, now that this is settled, bring me " + @AMOUNT_PINKPETAL + " Pink Petals, " + @AMOUNT_STINGER + " Scorpion Stingers and one Pink Tulip again.\""; goto L_Close; L_PlacedSecondFlower: // 21: Placed second magical flower mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Very good. You placed the second flower, right? I was able to feel it here."; + mes "\"Very good. You placed the second flower, right? I could feel it here."; mes "Everything is going very well.\""; - mes "Orum grins pleased."; + mes "Orum grins contently."; menu "What do you need next?", -, "How can we build a pentagram by randomly planting flowers?", L_AskPentagram; @@ -267,17 +267,17 @@ L_PlacedSecondFlower: // 21: Placed second magical flower L_AskPentagram: mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Randomly? The places are very carefully chosen! You see, it's going to be a very BIG pentagram.\""; + mes "\"Randomly? The spots for the flowers have been very carefully chosen! You see, it's going to be a very LARGE pentagram.\""; set OrumQuest, 22; next; goto L_ThirdFlower; L_ThirdFlower: // 22: Got task to bring materials for third magical flower mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Now we need " + @AMOUNT_WHITEFUR + " White Fur, " + @AMOUNT_REDSTINGER + " Red Scorpion Stingers and one White Tulip.\""; + mes "\"Now we need " + @AMOUNT_WHITEFUR + " White Furs, " + @AMOUNT_REDSTINGER + " Red Scorpion Stingers and one White Tulip.\""; menu "I got everything you want.", -, - "I'm still searching.", L_Close, + "I'm still trying to gather what you need.", L_Close, "And what is the pentagram going to do?", L_AskPentaEffect; if ((countitem("WhiteFur") < @AMOUNT_WHITEFUR) @@ -289,14 +289,14 @@ L_ThirdFlower: // 22: Got task to bring materials for third magical flower delitem "RedScorpionStinger", @AMOUNT_REDSTINGER; delitem "WhiteTulip", 1; - mes "Orum takes the things out of your hands and starts to prepare them."; + mes "Orum takes the materials out of your hands and starts preparing them."; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"This time you're going to help me. It's safer when I don't have to handle all of it myself. Ok, listen.\""; + mes "\"This time you're going to help me. It's safer when I don't have to handle all of it myself. Okay, listen.\""; next; - mes "\"Here is the rheological additive that you have to pour on it when the reaction between the pulvers is on its peak level. I'm going to slowly add a little more of the pulver, which will make it react faster. Got it?\""; + mes "\"Here is the rheological additive that you have to pour on it when the reaction between the powders is on its peak level. I'm going to slowly add a little more of the powder, which will make it react faster. Got it?\""; menu "Rheo-what?", -, - "Ok, let's try.", -, + "Okay, let's try.", -, "I'm not sure I understand...", -; mes "[Orum]"; @@ -317,7 +317,7 @@ L_EasyMinigame: set @bubblingLevel, @bubblingLevel + rand(1,10); if (@bubblingLevel > 27) goto L_EasyTooHigh; - mes "Orum adds some more pulver."; + mes "Orum adds some more powder."; goto L_EasyMinigame; L_EasyCheck: @@ -331,27 +331,27 @@ L_EasyCheck: L_EasyTooHigh: mes "Suddenly the mixture glows brightly. Then it calms down very quickly and turns into a weird greyish color."; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Are you sleeping? Now it's wasted. You waited too long.\""; + mes "\"Are you sleeping? Now it's ruined. You waited too long.\""; next; - mes "\"Now you have to collect the ingredients again.\""; + mes "\"You have to collect all the ingredients again, now.\""; goto L_Close; L_EasyTooEarly: - mes "You pour the liquid Orum gave you on this mixture."; + mes "You pour the liquid Orum gave you into the mixture."; mes "It stops bubbling and gets thicker... and thicker... and thicker..."; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"No! That was too early. See what you've done. It's hard as a rock now.\""; + mes "\"No! That was too early. Look at what you've done! It's hard as a rock now.\""; next; - mes "\"How annoying. You have to get new ingredients.\""; + mes "\"How annoying! You have to gather new ingredients.\""; goto L_Close; L_EasySuccess: getitem "WhiteSummonFlower", 1; set OrumQuest, 23; - mes "As you pour the liquid on the bubbling mixture, it calms down and becomes viscous. Orum takes the tulip and dips it into the mixture."; + mes "As you pour the liquid into the bubbling mixture, it calms down and becomes viscous. Orum takes the tulip and dips it into the mixture."; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Very well! Here it is.\""; + mes "\"Excellent! Here it is.\""; next; L_WayThirdFlower: mes "[Orum]"; @@ -360,20 +360,20 @@ L_WayThirdFlower: L_AskPentaEffect: mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Don't you have at least tiny knowledge of Astral magic? A pentagram is used to summon, of course.\""; + mes "\"Don't you know anything about Astral magic? A pentagram is used for summoning, of course.\""; goto L_Close; L_PlaceThirdFlower: // 23: Completed easy minigame and got task to place the third magical flower mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"What are you waiting for? Bring the third flower to its destination.\""; + mes "\"What are you waiting for? Place the third flower where it's supposed to go.\""; menu - "Ok.", L_Close, - "I forget where to put it.", L_WayThirdFlower, + "Okay.", L_Close, + "I forgot where to put it.", L_WayThirdFlower, "Unfortunately... I don't have it anymore.", -; mes "Orum sighs."; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"I hope this is a joke. No, you're serious? What an effrontery! This was a valuable and powerful magical artifact.\""; + mes "\"I hope this is a joke. No, you're serious? What impudence! This was a valuable and powerful magical artifact.\""; next; mes "\"This behaviour shouldn't remain unpunished. Pay a recompensation fee of " + @RECOMPENSATION_3 + " GP, and I'm going to allow you to continue helping us. So?\""; menu @@ -386,15 +386,15 @@ L_PlaceThirdFlower: // 23: Completed easy minigame and got task to place the thi set OrumQuest, 22; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Once again we need " + @AMOUNT_WHITEFUR + " White Fur, " + @AMOUNT_REDSTINGER + " Red Scorpion Stingers and one White Tulip.\""; + mes "\"Once again we need " + @AMOUNT_WHITEFUR + " White Furs, " + @AMOUNT_REDSTINGER + " Red Scorpion Stingers and one White Tulip.\""; goto L_Close; L_PlacedThirdFlower: // 24: Placed third magical flower mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"We're making very good progress. Now that you placed the third magical flower, only two more are missing."; - mes "But we shouldn't become careless now, each flower gets more difficult.\""; + mes "\"We're making very good progress. Now that you've placed the third magical flower, only two more are left."; + mes "But we shouldn't become careless now, with each flower the procedure gets more difficult.\""; menu - "Understood! What next?", -, + "Understood! What's next?", -, "What are we going to summon with that pentagram?", L_AskSummon; set OrumQuest, 25; @@ -402,7 +402,7 @@ L_PlacedThirdFlower: // 24: Placed third magical flower L_AskSummon: mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Beings from the astral plane of course. Some of them are already coming over when you place the flowers."; + mes "\"Beings from the astral plane, of course. Some of them are already coming through the rift when you place the flowers."; mes "But that is NOTHING compared to what will happen when the pentagram is complete! Hahaha!\""; set OrumQuest, 25; next; @@ -413,7 +413,7 @@ L_FourthFlower: // 25: Got task to bring materials for fourth magical flower mes "\"Now we need " + @AMOUNT_HARDSPIKE + " Hard Spikes, " + @AMOUNT_ANGRYSTINGER + " Angry Scorpion Stingers and one Yellow Rose.\""; menu "I managed to get everything.", -, - "I will get that.", L_Close, + "I'll go and gather the items.", L_Close, "Won't it be dangerous to summon so many aggressive monsters?", L_AskDanger; if ((countitem("HardSpike") < @AMOUNT_HARDSPIKE) @@ -425,22 +425,22 @@ L_FourthFlower: // 25: Got task to bring materials for fourth magical flower delitem "AngryScorpionStinger", @AMOUNT_ANGRYSTINGER; delitem "YellowRose", 1; - mes "Orum takes the materials and starts to pulverize them once again. You notice that his movements are slower this time and he looks very concentrated."; + mes "Orum takes the materials and starts to pulverize them once again. You notice that his movements are slower this time and he seems to be really concentrating."; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Ok. We're going to do it together again, but this time we switch the roles. You're going to mix the pulvers and I'm going to pour the rheological additive on it.\""; + mes "\"Okay. We're going to do it together again, but this time we'll switch the roles. You're going to mix the powders and I'm going to pour the rheological additive into the mixture.\""; next; mes "\"This is because... ahm, because you will learn something from it, yes."; - mes "But remember to handle the pulvers very careful, they're vitriolic.\""; + mes "But remember to handle the powders carefuly, they're highly vitriolic.\""; next; mes "\"You have two powders, one of them will make the mixture turn yellow, the other one will make it turn red."; - mes "You need to bring it some clear, strong orange and hold that for a moment, so I have to time to pour the rheological additive.\""; + mes "You need to make it a clear, strong orange and hold that for a moment. That way I'll have enough time to pour the rheological additive.\""; menu "Let's try it.", -, - "I'm unsure...", -; + "I'm not sure what to do...", -; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Just use the red powder when it's too bright, and the yellow powder when it's too dark. And be careful how much you use, additionally the mixture will randomly fluctuate a bit.\""; - mes "He mixes together a few of each pulver and then hands you the small bowls with the powders."; + mes "\"Just use the red powder when it's too bright, and the yellow powder when it's too dark. And be careful how much powder you use. The mixture will randomly fluctuate a bit, too, so keep that in mind.\""; + mes "He mixes together a few of each ingredients and then hands you two small bowls with the powders."; next; setarray @colorLevels$, "red", "light red", "dark orange", "orange", "light orange", "dark yellow", "yellow"; @@ -476,7 +476,7 @@ L_HardMinigame: L_HardRandom: set @colorLevel, @colorLevel + 3 - rand(6); - mes "The mixture frizzles and bubbles."; + mes "The mixture sizzles and bubbles."; if ((@colorLevel < 21) || (@colorLevel > 27)) set @goodColor, 0; @@ -498,49 +498,49 @@ L_Good: L_TooYellow: next; - mes "The mixture can't get any more yellow. The bubbling increases and quickly most of the liquid turns into steam that makes you cough."; + mes "The mixture can't get any more yellow. The bubbling increases and most of the liquid quickly turns into steam that makes you cough."; goto L_HardTooExtreme; L_TooRed: next; - mes "The mixture can't get any more red. Suddenly the bubbling gets even more violent, it seems it's corroding the caldron! Orum hastily pours the rheological additive on it to make it stop."; + mes "The mixture can't get any more red. Suddenly, the bubbling gets even more violent. It seems to be corroding the cauldron! Orum hastily pours the rheological additive on it to make it stop."; goto L_HardTooExtreme; L_HardTooExtreme: mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"What are you doing? It is supposed to turn into orange. You have to use both powders for that!\""; + mes "\"What are you doing? It is supposed to turn orange. You have to use both powders for that!\""; next; - mes "\"This is waste now. Go and collect new ingredients.\""; + mes "\"This is ruined now. Go and collect new ingredients.\""; goto L_Close; L_HardSuccess: getitem "YellowSummonFlower", 1; set OrumQuest, 26; - mes "Orum pours the rheological additive on the mixture and then drips the flower into the caldron."; + mes "Orum pours the rheological additive on the mixture and then dips the flower into the cauldron."; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Excellent! Wonderful. Here's the flower. I need to clean up the caldron, so you have to place the flower.\""; + mes "\"Excellent! Wonderful. Here's the flower. I need to clean up the cauldron, so in the meantime go place the flower.\""; next; L_WayFourthFlower: mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"To find the place, go south after leaving our cave, and then follow the path to the east. Watch out for that nasty forest witch living there, she doesn't like humans."; - mes "You have to place the flower on some small island in front of the coast, to get there you have to find a way through the caves that connect it with the mainland.\""; + mes "\"To find the place: go south after leaving our cave, and then follow the path to the east. Watch out for that nasty forest witch living there, she doesn't like humans."; + mes "You have to place the flower on a small island in front of the coast. To get there, you have to find a way through the caves that connect it with the mainland.\""; goto L_Close; L_AskDanger: mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Dangerous? Well, not really, since Waric and I are going to stay here in this cave.\""; + mes "\"Dangerous? Well, not really, since Waric and I are going to stay here in the cave.\""; menu - "That's... very appeasing.", -, + "That's... very comforting.", -, "And what about everyone outside? Like me!?", -; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Uhm, well. You won't be in the center of it, of course, where most of the monsters will appear."; + mes "\"Umm, well. You won't be in the center of it where the monsters will appear, of course."; mes "And you can handle a few of them, right?\""; goto L_Close; L_PlaceFourthFlower: // 26: Completed difficult minigame and got task to place the fourth magical flower mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"I can't await it! Everything is going so well! Why are you dawdling away? Go and place the fourth magical flower!\""; + mes "\"I can't wait! Everything is going so well! Why are you wasting time? Go and place the fourth magical flower!\""; menu "All right.", L_Close, "Please describe where to place it again.", L_WayFourthFlower, @@ -548,9 +548,9 @@ L_PlaceFourthFlower: // 26: Completed difficult minigame and got task to place t mes "Orum shakes his head in disbelief."; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Lost it? Unbelievable! How can you lose it?\""; + mes "\"Lost it? Unbelievable! How could you lose it?\""; next; - mes "\"This behaviour shouldn't remain unpunished. Pay a recompensation fee of " + @RECOMPENSATION_4 + " GP, and I'm going to allow you to continue helping us. So?\""; + mes "\"This behaviour shouldn't remain unpunished. Pay a recompensation fee of " + @RECOMPENSATION_4 + " GP, and I will to allow you to continue helping us. So?\""; menu "Here it is.", -, "That's too expensive!", L_NoRecompensation; @@ -566,7 +566,7 @@ L_PlaceFourthFlower: // 26: Completed difficult minigame and got task to place t L_PlacedFourthFlower: // 27: Placed fourth magical flower mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Oh, almost! Only the last flower needs to be placed. Don't lose concentration now!"; + mes "\"Oh, almost! Only the last flower needs to be placed. Don't lose your focus now!"; mes "This last flower is the most complicated one. Pay attention.\""; menu "Tell me what you need!", -, @@ -578,9 +578,9 @@ L_PlacedFourthFlower: // 27: Placed fourth magical flower L_AskReason: mes "[Orum]"; mes "\"Let's say... it's about paying back an old debt."; - mes "I'll give you a hint: think about what's in the middle of the pentagram. Or rather who is.\""; + mes "I'll give you a hint: think about what's in the center of the pentagram. Or rather who is.\""; next; - mes "\"However, let's get back to business!\""; + mes "\"Anyway, let's get back to business!\""; set OrumQuest, 28; next; goto L_FifthFlower; @@ -604,40 +604,40 @@ L_FifthFlower: // 28: Got task to bring materials for fifth magical flower delitem "BlackScorpionStinger", @AMOUNT_BLACKSTINGER; delitem "RedRose", 1; - mes "Orum takes the materials and takes a deep breath. Then he prepares them similiarly to the materials for the other flowers."; + mes "Orum takes the materials and draws a deep breath. He then begins to prepare them similarly to the materials for the other flowers."; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Well. Basically, we need to do the same as with the other flowers. But we need to be careful, this mixture is a bit more delicate. Would you like to do the add the rheological additive or mix the pulvers?\""; + mes "\"Well, basically, we need to do the same as with the other flowers. We need to be careful, however, because this mixture is a bit more delicate. Would you like to do the add the rheological additive or mix the powders?\""; menu "I'll handle the additive.", L_Additive, - "Let me mix the pulvers.", L_Pulvers; + "Let me mix the powders.", L_Pulvers; L_Additive: mes "Orum agrees and starts mixing the powders. You're ready to pour in the additive once the mixture reached a high level of bubbling."; next; - mes "But the next dash of powder Orum adds causes the mixture to sputter, and you get something on your hand!"; + mes "The next dash of powder Orum adds causes the mixture to sputter and splash. Some of the hot liquid lands on the back of your hand!"; heal -5, 0; menu "Ouch!",-, - "AAh!", -, + "Aah!", -, "Urgh!", -; - mes "As you step back from the caldron you jostle Orum, and the Red Rose falls out of his pocket into the caldron."; + mes "As you step back from the cauldron you jostle Orum, and the Red Rose falls out of his pocket into the cauldron."; goto L_FlowerHat; L_Pulvers: - mes "You start mixing together the powders. It bubbles much more than during the previous brewing."; + mes "You start mixing the powders together. It bubbles much more than during the previous brewing."; next; - mes "The next dash of powder you add causes the mixture to sputter, and some of it gets on Orums hand! He screams and jumps back while waving around his hand."; + mes "The next dash of powder you add causes the mixture to bubble and splash. Some of the hot liquid lands on Orum's hand! He screams and jumps back while waving his hand around."; next; - mes "This causes the flower to fall out of his pocket, landing exactly in the caldron."; + mes "This causes the flower to fall out of his pocket, landing right into the cauldron."; next; mes "Orum stares at it."; goto L_FlowerHat; L_FlowerHat: mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Fool! See what you've done! It's ruined!\""; + mes "\"Fool! See what you've done? It's ruined!\""; next; - mes "\"Though we have enough of the materials left to start over... Here, take this garbage out and get a new Red Rose!\""; + mes "\"Though, we still have enough of the materials left to start over. Here, take this garbage out and get a new Red Rose!\""; getitem "RedRoseHat", 1; set OrumQuest, 29; goto L_Close; @@ -645,31 +645,31 @@ L_FlowerHat: L_AskSagatha: mes "[Orum]"; mes "\"Ah, clever. Yes, you're right."; - mes "That self-righteous forest witch thinks she's better than other people. And she thinks that gives her the right to stick her nose into other mages' businesses.\""; + mes "That self-righteous forest witch thinks she's better than other people. She thinks that gives her the right to stick her nose into other mages' affairs.\""; next; - mes "\"And even worse, she thinks she can PUNISH other mages for actions she considers wrong - \""; + mes "\"What's even worse, she thinks she can punish other mages for actions she considers wrong - \""; mes "[Waric]"; - mes "\"Orum! You don't need to get into the details with this.\""; + mes "\"Orum! You do not need to get into the details of this.\""; next; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Oh, eh, of course. However, we'll teach her a lesson."; - mes "And you are going to help us.\""; + mes "\"Oh, heh, of course. However, we'll teach her a lesson."; + mes "You are going to help us.\""; goto L_Close; L_FailedFifthFlower: // 29: Failed unbeatable minigame and got the flower hat mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Did you get a new Red Rose, so we can finally create the last magical flower?\""; + mes "\"Did you get a new Red Rose, so we can create the last magical flower?\""; menu "Yes.", -, "Not yet.", L_Close, - "Will those monsters hurt Sagatha? Or... kill her?", L_AskHurtSagatha; + "Will those monsters hurt Sagatha? Or kill her?", L_AskHurtSagatha; if (countitem("RedRose") < 1) goto L_NoItem; delitem "RedRose", 1; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Finally! This time I'll do it all by myself. Step back with your clumsy fingers, so it doesn't get ruined again.\""; + mes "\"Finally! This time I'll do it all by myself. You and your clumsy fingers need to take a step back so it won't get ruined again.\""; next; mes "You watch while Orum carefully prepares the last magic flower."; next; @@ -680,19 +680,19 @@ L_FailedFifthFlower: // 29: Failed unbeatable minigame and got the flower hat next; L_WayFifthFlower: mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"To place the last flower, go East and follow the road. At some point it might be difficult to get through, since the road isn't used anymore, and the forest is growing back."; - mes "But you have to find a way and reach a clearing with some very old and big tree. There you'll find another prepared spot with some flowers.\""; + mes "\"To place the last flower: go east and follow the road. At some point it might be difficult to get through, since the road isn't used anymore, and the forest is growing back."; + mes "But you have to find a way and reach a clearing with a very old and tall tree. There you'll find another prepared spot with some flowers.\""; goto L_Close; L_AskHurtSagatha: mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Oh, are you getting afraid? I thought you want to support us.\""; + mes "\"Oh, are you getting scared? I thought you wanted to support us.\""; next; mes "\"However, no need to worry. Sagatha is much too powerful to get seriously injured by this, sadly.\""; next; - mes "\"If we'd want to actually harm her, we'd need to summon some greater powers. But that'd be risky in the best case, and devastatingly costly in the worst.\""; + mes "\"If wanted to actually harm her, we'd need to summon some greater powers. That'd be risky in the best case, and devastatingly costly in the worst.\""; next; - mes "\"Unless... I assume you're not open to donating your soul for a pact with a higher astral being, are you?\""; + mes "\"Unless... well, I assume you're not open to donating your soul for a pact with a higher astral being, are you?\""; goto L_Close; L_PlaceFifthFlower: // 30: Got task to place the fifth flower @@ -704,11 +704,11 @@ L_PlaceFifthFlower: // 30: Got task to place the fifth flower "Please keep calm, but I lost the flower.", -; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Lost it? You incompetent excuse of a servant! What do you think you're doing?\""; + mes "\"Lost it? You incompetent excuse for a servant! What do you think you're doing?\""; next; - mes "\"This behaviour shouldn't remain unpunished. Pay a recompensation fee of " + @RECOMPENSATION_5 + " GP, and I'm going to allow you to continue helping us. You also have to bring the needed materials for a new flower.\""; + mes "\"This behaviour shouldn't remain unpunished. Pay a recompensation fee of " + @RECOMPENSATION_5 + " GP, and I'm going to allow you to continue helping us. You also have to bring the necessary materials for a new flower.\""; menu - "Ok, here it is.", -, + "Okay, here it is.", -, "What materials do we need?", L_MaterialFifth, "That's too expensive!", L_NoRecompensation; @@ -727,9 +727,9 @@ L_PlaceFifthFlower: // 30: Got task to place the fifth flower delitem "RedRose", 1; getitem "RedSummonFlower", 1; - mes "Orum takes the material and prepares a new flower."; + mes "Orum takes the materials and prepares a new flower."; mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Here is another one. Don't mess it up this time, understood?\""; + mes "\"Here is another flower. Don't mess it up this time, understood?\""; goto L_Close; L_MaterialFifth: @@ -749,12 +749,12 @@ L_PlacedFifthFlower: // 31: Placed fifth flower L_Done: mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Ah, I still can't stop smiling when I remember Sagatha's reaction. You've done a very good job.\""; + mes "\"Ah, whenever I think of Sagatha's reaction, it brings a smile to my face. You've done a very good job.\""; goto L_Close; L_NoRecompensation: mes "[Orum]"; - mes "\"Well, you could still try to get back the magical flower instead. Your decision.\""; + mes "\"Well, you could still try to recover the magical flower instead. It's your decision.\""; goto L_Close; L_NoMoney: diff --git a/world/map/npc/017-4/waric.txt b/world/map/npc/017-4/waric.txt index 340f2959..663d6c07 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/017-4/waric.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/017-4/waric.txt @@ -27,25 +27,25 @@ if (OrumQuest > 15) goto L_Mistrust; mes "[Waric]"; - mes "\"You! You're really more insistent than it's good for you...\""; + mes "\"You! You really are far too persistent to know what is good for you!\""; mes "He turns towards Orum."; next; mes "[Waric]"; - mes "\"It seems your ridiculous Guarding Spirit failed his task."; - mes "Deal with this, we really can't afford more of this distractions.\""; + mes "\"It seems your ridiculous Guarding Spirit has failed at his task."; + mes "Deal with this. We cannot afford any more of these distractions.\""; goto L_Close; L_Mistrust: mes "[Waric]"; - mes "\"So you say you want to help us? You don't look very competent."; - mes "Also, I don't see what motivates you to do this.\""; + mes "\"So, you say you want to help us? You do not look very competent."; + mes "Also, I do not see what motivation you have to help.\""; next; - mes "\"Show your usefulness, then I might take you serious.\""; + mes "\"Demonstrate your worth and I might take you seriously.\""; goto L_Close; L_Flower1: mes "[Waric]"; - mes "\"You placed the first flower. I'm surprised, I didn't expect you to actually stay and be useful.\""; + mes "\"You placed the first flower. Why, I am surprised! I did not expect you to actually stay and become useful.\""; goto L_Close; // TODO: enable this when adding the spells // also add logic to the other label's dialogs/eventually change their dialog to fit better @@ -60,8 +60,8 @@ L_Flower1: if (!@killed_mouboo && !@cut_tree) goto L_Undecided; mes "[Waric]"; - mes "\"Hm. Actually, I could do that. You seem to have some potential."; - mes "But first go on with the next summoning artifact.\""; + mes "\"Hmm. I suppose I could do that. You seem to have some potential."; + mes "First, proceed with the next summoning artifact.\""; goto L_Close; L_Flower2: @@ -71,18 +71,18 @@ L_Flower2: L_Flower3: mes "[Waric]"; - mes "\"I saw that you helped to create the third flower which you just placed. Good.\""; + mes "\"I saw that you helped to create and place the third flower. Good.\""; goto L_Close; L_Flower4: mes "[Waric]"; - mes "\"We're very close to reach our goal, now that you've placed the fourth flower. Keep it up.\""; + mes "\"Now that you have placed the fourth flower, we are very close to reaching our goal. Keep it up.\""; goto L_Close; L_Flower5: mes "[Waric]"; - mes "\"Hahaha, excellent. You handled the creation of our pentagram very well. I'll keep that in mind."; - mes "I advised Orum to give you some reward, did you already talk to him?\""; + mes "\"Hahaha, excellent. You handled the creation of our pentagram very well. I will be keeping that in mind."; + mes "I have advised Orum to give you a reward. Go now and speak with him.\""; goto L_Close; L_Spells: @@ -93,14 +93,14 @@ L_Spells: L_Undecided: mes "[Waric]"; - mes "\"Well. I could. But I'm not sure you're trustworthy.\""; + mes "\"Well, I could. However, I am not sure you are all that trustworthy.\""; next; - mes "\"How can I know you're not going to run to Sagatha with what I'd teach you?\""; + mes "\"How do I know you will not run off to Sagatha with what I would be teaching you?\""; goto L_Close; L_Sagatha: mes "[Waric]"; - mes "\"You're already a student of Sagatha. I won't teach you anything.\""; + mes "\"You are already a student of Sagatha. I will not teach you anything!\""; goto L_Close; L_Close: @@ -142,4 +142,4 @@ L_Close: OnInit: if (!debug) disablenpc "DebugFlowerP"; -} +} \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/world/map/npc/018-1/flowerpentagram3.txt b/world/map/npc/018-1/flowerpentagram3.txt index 1e41e555..81f994eb 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/018-1/flowerpentagram3.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/018-1/flowerpentagram3.txt @@ -7,7 +7,7 @@ if (OrumQuest > 23) goto L_PlacedThirdFlower; if (OrumQuest == 23) goto L_ThirdFlower; - message strcharinfo(0), "Something is odd with this place."; + message strcharinfo(0), "Something is odd about this place."; end; L_ThirdFlower: @@ -19,7 +19,7 @@ L_ThirdFlower: if (isin("018-1.gat", 82, 28, 84, 30)) goto L_Place; - mes "This doesn't work, you're too far away."; + mes "This isn't working, you're too far away."; goto L_Close; L_Place: @@ -37,8 +37,8 @@ L_Place: if (countitem("WhiteSummonFlower") < 1) goto L_NoFlower; delitem "WhiteSummonFlower", 1; - mes "Knowing what will happen, you prepare yourself for a fight. Then you go ahead and place the magical flower."; - mes "You feel the familiar tension around you. Here they come."; + mes "Knowing what will happen, you prepare yourself for a fight. Then you go ahead with the ritual and place the magical flower."; + mes "You feel the now familiar tension around you. Here they come."; set OrumQuest, 24; close2; areamonster "018-1.gat", 73, 22, 89, 36, "", 1105, 1, "#FlowerPentagram3::OnSquirrelDeath"; @@ -84,24 +84,24 @@ OnAScorpionDeath: L_MonstersAlive: mes "As you get closer to the place, you feel an unnerving presence."; - mes "The place has recently been used to summon something! And the beings are still near!"; + mes "This place has recently been used to summon something! And the beings are still nearby!"; next; mes "You should get rid of them before attempting the summoning yourself."; goto L_Close; L_NoFlower: - mes "You reach into your inventory to take out the flower and place it. But you can't find it!"; - mes "Did you lose it somewhere along the way? If you can't find it again, go talk to Orum."; + mes "You reach into your inventory to take out the flower and place it, but you can't find it!"; + mes "Did you lose it somewhere along the way? If you can't find it, go talk to Orum again."; goto L_Close; L_PlacedThirdFlower: - mes "You see the place where you put the third of Orum's magical flowers."; - mes "You can feel the magic power around the place, waiting to be unleashed."; + mes "You placed the third of Orum's magical flowers on this spot."; + mes "You can feel the magical power around the place, waiting to be unleashed."; goto L_Close; L_PlacedFifthFlower: - mes "You remember this place. Here you put the third of Orum's magical flowers."; - mes "But after the pentagram was finished and the summoning happened, everything is back to normal with this spot."; + mes "You remember this place. You placed the third of Orum's magical flowers here."; + mes "However, now that the summoning spell has been cast, everything is back to normal here."; goto L_Close; L_Close: diff --git a/world/map/npc/055-1/flowerpentagram4.txt b/world/map/npc/055-1/flowerpentagram4.txt index 364963c1..10bf0539 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/055-1/flowerpentagram4.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/055-1/flowerpentagram4.txt @@ -7,11 +7,11 @@ if (OrumQuest > 26) goto L_PlacedFourthFlower; if (OrumQuest == 26) goto L_FourthFlower; - message strcharinfo(0), "Something is odd with this place."; + message strcharinfo(0), "Something is odd about this place."; end; L_FourthFlower: - mes "This is the spot to place the fourth of Orum's magical flowers."; + mes "This is the spot where you have to place the fourth of Orum's magical flowers."; menu "Place the flower.", -, "Leave.", L_Close; @@ -19,7 +19,7 @@ L_FourthFlower: if (isin("055-1.gat", 140, 88, 142, 90)) goto L_Place; - mes "This doesn't work, you're too far away."; + mes "This isn't working, you're too far away."; goto L_Close; L_Place: @@ -39,8 +39,8 @@ L_Place: if (countitem("YellowSummonFlower") < 1) goto L_NoFlower; delitem "YellowSummonFlower", 1; - mes "Worried about what will leak from the astral plane this time, you prepare yourself and put the flower in place."; - mes "As expected you feel the magical tension building up. They're coming."; + mes "Worried about what will shift from the astral plane this time, you prepare yourself and put the flower in place."; + mes "As expected, you feel the magical tension building up. They're coming."; set OrumQuest, 27; close2; areamonster "055-1.gat", 133, 87, 144, 99, "", 1105, 1, "#FlowerPentagram4::OnSquirrelDeath"; @@ -98,24 +98,24 @@ OnBScorpionDeath: L_MonstersAlive: mes "As you get closer to the place, you feel an unnerving presence."; - mes "The place has recently been used to summon something! And the beings are still near!"; + mes "This place has recently been used to summon something! And the beings are still nearby!"; next; mes "You should get rid of them before attempting the summoning yourself."; goto L_Close; L_NoFlower: mes "You search your belongings for the magical flower. Where is it?"; - mes "If you lost it, you should talk to Orum."; + mes "If you lost it, you should talk to Orum again."; goto L_Close; L_PlacedFourthFlower: - mes "Here you put the fourth of Orum's magical flowers."; - mes "There's a slight glowing of magic power around the place, waiting to be unleashed when you put the last one into place."; + mes "You placed the fourth of Orum's magical flowers here."; + mes "You can still feel the magical power shimmering around this place, waiting to be unleashed."; goto L_Close; L_PlacedFifthFlower: - mes "This is the place where you put the fourth of Orum's magical flowers."; - mes "But after the pentagram was finished and the summoning happened, everything is back to normal with this spot."; + mes "This is where you placed the fourth of Orum's magical flowers."; + mes "However, now that the summoning spell has been cast, everything is back to normal here."; goto L_Close; L_Close: diff --git a/world/map/npc/056-1/flowerpentagram5.txt b/world/map/npc/056-1/flowerpentagram5.txt index 6562d8e8..345ecf2a 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/056-1/flowerpentagram5.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/056-1/flowerpentagram5.txt @@ -7,11 +7,11 @@ if (OrumQuest == 30) goto L_FifthFlower; - message strcharinfo(0), "Something is odd with this place."; + message strcharinfo(0), "Something is odd about this place."; end; L_FifthFlower: - mes "This have to be the place for the last magical flower. When you place it, the pentagram will be completed."; + mes "This has to be the spot for the last magical flower. When you place it, the pentagram will be completed."; menu "Place the flower.", -, "Leave.", L_Close; @@ -19,7 +19,7 @@ L_FifthFlower: if (isin("056-1.gat", 61, 30, 63, 32)) goto L_Place; - mes "This doesn't work, you're too far away."; + mes "This isn't working, you're too far away."; goto L_Close; L_Place: @@ -36,9 +36,9 @@ L_Place: if (@localMonsterCount > 4) goto L_MonstersAlive; - mes "Nervous of what's going to happen, you take the last of the flowers and put it into place."; + mes "Nervous about what's going to happen, you take the last of the flowers and put it into its place."; next; - mes "Tension builds up around you, much stronger than all the times before. It pressures your head, your nose starts bleeding."; + mes "Tension builds up around you, much stronger than before. You can feel it compressing your head, and a liquid warmth spreads under your nose, leaving a metallic taste on your lips."; heal -5, 0; next; callfunc "FlowerPentagramCount"; @@ -49,7 +49,7 @@ L_Place: goto L_NoFlower; delitem "RedSummonFlower", 1; - mes "The moment you think you can't endure it anymore, the webbing of the world seems to tear apart."; + mes "The pressure builds to the point where you don't think you can endure it any longer; the fabric that binds your consciousness together seemingly unravels."; set OrumQuest, 31; close2; areamonster "056-1.gat", 56, 26, 80, 46, "", 1105, 3, "#FlowerPentagram5::OnSquirrelDeath"; @@ -107,18 +107,18 @@ OnBScorpionDeath: end; L_TooEarly: - mes "Then everything calms down again and then tension vanishes. You're unsure what's going on."; + mes "Suddenly, everything calms down again and the tension vanishes. You find yourself confused about what's going on."; next; mes "You pick up the flower again."; next; - mes "Looking at the place more closely, it seems another summoning has happened just before, leaving the path between this world and the astral plane drained and exhausted."; + mes "Looking at the place more closely, it seems another summoning has happened just before, leaving the pathway between this world and the astral plane drained and exhausted."; next; - mes "You should wait a while until it recovers, or go and search the creatures that got summoned."; + mes "You should wait a while until it recharges, or go and search for the creatures that were summoned."; goto L_Close; L_MonstersAlive: mes "As you get closer to the place, you feel an unnerving presence."; - mes "The place has recently been used to summon something! And the beings are still near!"; + mes "This place has recently been used to summon something! And the beings are still nearby!"; next; mes "You should get rid of them before attempting the summoning yourself."; goto L_Close; @@ -129,8 +129,8 @@ L_NoFlower: goto L_Close; L_PlacedFifthFlower: - mes "This is the place where you put the last one of Orum's magical flowers."; - mes "But after the pentagram was finished and the summoning happened, everything is back to normal with this spot."; + mes "This is where you placed the last of Orum's magical flowers."; + mes "However, now that the summoning spell has been cast, everything is back to normal here."; goto L_Close; L_Close: -- cgit v1.2.3-70-g09d2