From 9bf115afded2f22a06c99e22a1f864b5c97d83ed Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Vreality Date: Mon, 5 May 2014 06:49:13 -0500 Subject: Dialogue changes to NPCs Improved the dialogue of the bookshelf containing "zukminbirf." Added "croupier" name tag to the Roulette NPC's dialog Improved grammar and wording Replaced ". " with ". " Replaced " -- " with an en dash (" – "). MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=UTF-8 Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit --- world/map/npc/009-1/jack.txt | 44 ++++++++++++++++++++++---------------------- 1 file changed, 22 insertions(+), 22 deletions(-) (limited to 'world/map/npc/009-1') diff --git a/world/map/npc/009-1/jack.txt b/world/map/npc/009-1/jack.txt index 1cafe780..b5244244 100644 --- a/world/map/npc/009-1/jack.txt +++ b/world/map/npc/009-1/jack.txt @@ -39,7 +39,7 @@ if (@Q_Forestbow > 1) goto L_Bow_state_2; mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"Hello there, my name is Jack Lumber, the enemy of all trees. If you need some firewood just let me know.\""; + mes "\"Hello there! My name is Jack Lumber, the enemy of all trees. If you need some firewood, just let me know.\""; if (@inspector == 1) goto L_NohMask_Ask; goto L_NotInspector; @@ -60,21 +60,21 @@ L_Next: L_Next1: mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"A week ago I was going to chop down one of those twigleaf trees in the forest to the southwest. These twigleafs are the trees that give me the living wood you speak of. I was just chopping away with my axe and what happened? One of its branches hit me! I thought it fell down or the wind blew it. It hurt! I shook it off and struck it again with my axe and another branch hit me! I got angry and started to chop off all the branches near the ground so this couldn't happen anymore. But I still can't believe what happened next.\""; + mes "\"A week ago, I was going to chop down one of those twigleaf trees in the forest to the southwest – these twigleafs are the trees that give me the living wood you speak of. I was just chopping away with my axe, and guess what happened? One of its branches hit me! At first, I thought it fell down or the wind blew it, but it hurt! After I shook it off and struck the tree again with my axe, another branch hit me! I got angry and started to chop off all the low-hanging branches so this couldn't happen anymore. Even after all that though, I still can't believe what happened next.\""; next; menu "What happened? ", L_Next2; L_Next2: mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"You'll think I am insane when I tell you.\""; + mes "\"You'll think I'm insane if I tell you...\""; next; menu "I won't. I promise.", L_Next3; L_Next3: mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"OK. After I chopped off a few branches the whole tree started to move. Its roots tore out of the earth, all the branches started to wave around and a face appeared on the trunk. The whole tree CAME TO LIFE! It was mad!\""; + mes "\"Alright, well... After I chopped off a few branches, the whole tree started to move! Its roots tore out of the earth, all the branches started to wave around, and a face appeared on the trunk. The whole tree CAME TO LIFE! It was mad!\""; next; menu "Did you run away?", L_Next4, @@ -82,28 +82,28 @@ L_Next3: L_Next4: mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"I fought, of course! I took my axe and attacked the beast! It hit me here *points at a bruise at his shoulder*, here *lifts his trouser leg to show another bruise* and here *lifts his shirt and reveals some even worse bruises*. But I didn't give up. I chopped away at it, branch after branch, and in the end I chopped off its roots and it fell to the ground motionless.\""; + mes "\"I fought it, of course! I took my axe and attacked the beast! It hit me here *points at a bruise on his shoulder,* here *lifts his trouser leg to show another bruise,* and here *lifts his shirt and reveals even worse bruises.* But I didn't give up! I chopped away at it, branch after branch, and in the end I chopped off its roots, and it fell to the ground – motionless.\""; next; menu "So you beat the monster? Then why are you so scared?", L_Next5; L_Next5: mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"Well, I was exhausted and had to rest. A few minutes passed and suddenly I was surrounded by a dozen or more of these living trees!\""; + mes "\"Well, I was exhausted and had to rest. A few minutes passed, and suddenly I was practically surrounded by a dozen or more of these living trees!\""; next; menu - "Did you fight them, too? ", L_Next6; + "Did you fight them too? ", L_Next6; L_Next6: mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"Are you crazy? I barely destroyed one of those beasts. I was in no shape to fight again. I ran away as fast as I could. Lucky for me the monsters aren't that fast on their tiny root legs. Ha!\""; + mes "\"Are you crazy? I barely destroyed one of those beasts; I was in no shape to fight again! I ran away as fast as I could, and lucky for me the monsters aren't that fast on their tiny root legs. Ha!\""; next; menu - "So you aren't chopping down trees anymore?", L_Next7; + "So, I guess you aren't chopping down trees anymore?", L_Next7; L_Next7: mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"I still do. It's my job. But I no longer chop those twigleafs, I'll tell you that. I know the bowyer master wants some wood from them, but I don't care. I won't risk my life for a few gold pieces. If you want to, just go to the southwest. But I won't go there ever again.\""; + mes "\"I still do; it's my job. But I'll no longer chop those twigleafs – I'll tell you that. I know the bow master wants some twigleaf wood, but I don't care. I won't risk MY life for a few gold pieces! If you really want to, just go to the southwest, but I can't help you. I won't go there ever again.\""; next; menu "Southwest you say? OK, thank you.", L_Next8; @@ -117,14 +117,14 @@ L_Bow_state_2: // Bow state 4: The player has found a perfect piece of wood. if (@Q_Forestbow > 3) goto L_Bow_state_4; - mes "\"Good luck hunting those tree monsters - you will need it.\""; + mes "\"Good luck hunting those tree monsters – you'll need it.\""; if (@inspector != 1) goto L_Close; goto L_NohMask_Ask; L_Bow_state_4: mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"You've finally found that perfect piece of living wood Alan needs to make a Forest bow, haven't you?\""; + mes "\"You've finally found that perfect piece of living wood that Alan needs to make a Forest Bow, haven't you?\""; next; menu "I couldn't afford the bow, though...", L_Shield_state_0, @@ -156,13 +156,13 @@ L_Shield_state_0: set @child_of_jack$, "son"; mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"You no doubt remember how I struggled with those beasts, fighting for my life. Scared me, those seven-branched little stumps did! Never since that day have I strayed near them. And here comes you, cutting them down one by one. I'm proud of you, to dare those trunks a fight. You're strong as if you were my own " + @child_of_jack$ + "!\""; + mes "\"You no doubt remember how I struggled with those beasts, fighting for my life. Scared me, those seven-branched little stumps did! Never since that day have I strayed near them, and yet there you are, cutting them down one by one. I'm proud of you – to dare to fight those trunks is admirable indeed. You're as strong as if you were my own " + @child_of_jack$ + "!\""; next; goto L_Shield_state_1; L_Shield_state_1: mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"I have an idea. What would you say about a new shield?\""; + mes "\"I have an idea. What would you say about a new shield?\""; next; if (@inspector == 1) menu @@ -175,7 +175,7 @@ L_Shield_state_1: L_Yes: mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"All I need is " + @RAWLOGS_AMOUNT + " raw logs. This needn't be highest-quality wood; pretty much any log you can find should work. Oh, and I'll also need " + @SHIELD_COST + " GP for other materials.\""; + mes "\"All I need is " + @RAWLOGS_AMOUNT + " raw logs. This needn't be high quality wood; pretty much any log you can find should work. Oh, and I'll also need " + @SHIELD_COST + " GP for other materials.\""; next; set @Q_Woodenshield, 2; callsub S_Update_Mask; @@ -204,14 +204,14 @@ L_Next10: callsub S_Update_Mask; mes "[Jack Lumber]"; mes "\"Have a seat.\""; - mes "Jack saws the logs into pieces, then shaves them until they are smooth to the touch."; - mes "Applying some strong-smelling liquid, he tans them in darker hues."; + mes "Jack saws the logs into pieces and then sands them until they are smooth to the touch."; + mes "Applying some strong-smelling liquid, he tans them to a darker hue."; next; mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "Grabbing one of two leftover pieces, he begins to carve it into a round shape, then repeats this with the second piece-- shield handles, from what you can tell."; + mes "Grabbing one of two leftover pieces, he begins to carve it into a round shape, then repeats this with the second piece – shield handles from what you can tell."; next; mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "Meanwhile, the sun has dried the other pieces. Jack places them next to each other, adds a frame, and nails everything together."; + mes "Meanwhile, the sun has dried the other pieces. Jack places them next to each other, adds a frame, and nails everything together."; mes "The resulting shield looks usable already, but Jack applies another liquid to it and leaves it to dry for a few moments."; next; mes "[Jack Lumber]"; @@ -228,12 +228,12 @@ L_Not_enough_logs: L_Not_enough_money: mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"You don't have enough gold, I'm afraid. I need " + @SHIELD_COST + " GP to finish your shield.\""; + mes "\"I'm afraid that you don't have enough gold. I need " + @SHIELD_COST + " GP to finish your shield.\""; goto L_Close; L_TooMany: mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"You don't have enough room for the shield. Come back when you do.\""; + mes "\"You don't have enough room to carry the shield. Come back when you do.\""; goto L_Close; L_Shield_state_3: @@ -279,7 +279,7 @@ L_Daily: next; mes "[Jack Lumber]"; - mes "\"Check back with me tomorrow to see if I need any help with that shipment.\""; + mes "\"Check back with me tomorrow, and I'll let you know if I need any help with that shipment.\""; goto L_Close; -- cgit v1.2.3-60-g2f50